You can’t admit to losing it as often as you do
I know just as well as you that you love your children more than life itself. It’s love that can’t be put into words. But parenthood and especially motherhood comes with entirely unreasonable expectations. Many mothers have high expectations of themselves and what they need to do in order to be a “good mom.” To be able to fulfill all these demands, many lose sight of themselves and more or less obliterate themselves, ignoring their own needs, wishes, and desires. Life becomes all about the kids.
But we don’t work like that, we don’t stop being human just because we become humans. We still have needs and wants, and parents (read moms) need to tell their families what they want and need. When this isn’t happening, they’re holding everything in being miserable until they can’t keep it in anymore exploding on everyone in their family. What follows is guilt and not feeling good enough.
And furthermore, by saying out loud how often you lose it makes you feel even worse as a mom than you already do, you’re ashamed, so you don’t talk about it and get the readily available tools. All in vain!
This is by far the most common problem for all my clients.
I urge you not to let that be your everyday life!
My tips for you:
- Pay attention to what you need and want and let your family know it.
- Take responsibility for your own happiness and wellbeing by doing the things you need and want.
- Ponder over what a “good mom” actually means to you. Is it really possible to be that person?
- Decided a more realistic view of what a “good mom” is and strive to be that person instead.
If you need any help with breaking this vicious circle of being angry, exhausted, and exploding on your family, read about my course here. It will give you the satisfying, collaborative family life you dream of.